15 Jul Handling Storms of Life Gracefully

Last week, I was supposed to be in San Antonio, TX, facilitating a jam-packed 3-day workshop. I was excited to engage with the participants on the following topics:

1. Leading from the bottom up,
2. Busting silos,
3. Problem-solving and decision-making, and
4. Public speaking skills.

Thanks to Hurricane Beryl, it was postponed. By the way, if you’re in San Antonio, please reach out offline and see if we can meet while I’m there.

None of my trips have ever been canceled or postponed because of a hurricane. This was my first experience, and below are a few takeaways:

• First, I had no clue about what was coming. I was preparing and packing when the client called to inform me that Hurricane Beryl was brewing and that we might need to postpone the session.

This must feel familiar to you. You strategize, plan, and stress yourself out to do something great without knowing that a ‘storm’ is brewing, coming your way with the speed of light to disrupt your well-designed plan. I’ve been there more than once, and I wouldn’t say I like it when that happens.

• Second, hurricane experts predicted Beryl’s path. San Antonio was on its path. Guess what? Beryl curved and missed San Antonio.

Again, this must feel familiar to you. How often do experts in their respective fields predict things and miss the mark? Many, many times…

• Third, I’ve come a long way in dealing with disruptions. In the past, this disruption would have pissed me off big time and ruined, at least, that day. This time, I chatted with the client calmly. We brainstormed on how to handle the issue. As soon as we finished our conversation, without any stress or complaining, I began postponing my flight, hotel, and car rental. I also canceled my engagements in the week we postponed the workshop.

Of course, the disruption I experienced was insignificant compared to the damage Beryl caused elsewhere. Precious people died: 10 in the Caribbean and 8 in the south-east of Texas and Louisiana. Millions lost power. Very sad!

• Fourth, another reminder is that I’m not always in charge. Unplanned changes teach us that we don’t have control over many things in life. Planned change is relatively easy. We initiate and plan for it. Even if it feels uncomfortable and the change may not go as planned, at least we invited it. Unfortunately, unplanned changes are uninvited storms like hurricanes. We have no say. We must immediately humble and adjust ourselves to the crisis, or else…

One of the transformations I’ve passed through in life is to create some room for surprises and adjust without being pissed off, stressed out, and hurting my well-being. However, since I’m not always in charge and things that I haven’t planned may happen, it doesn’t mean I shouldn’t strategize and plan. I should keep the balance: strategize, plan, and have backups (Not just plan B, C, D, E…). When things that you’ve not anticipated surface:

• Breathin and breath out,
• Accept the reality,
• Regroup, restrategize, replan and
• March forward with the modified plan…

Let me give you some background and context.

I’m saying all of this even if I used to hate it when things were out of my control. I’ve NOT always been like this. It took me years to understand that when life throws me some surprises that may mess up my plans, I learned to handle them gracefully.

If you have taken the MBTI assessment, I’m a J. Those of us who have a preference for J, most of us (there are always exceptions) prefer when things are:

1. Organized,
2. Planed, and
3. Predictable.

Surprises aren’t within your comfort zone when you’re a J, unlike those who have a preference for P. You struggle to adjust. It takes you lots of energy and time to adapt to unplanned changes.

Of course, I’ve worked on myself and have seen improvements in handling surprises. What is more? I’ve been helping leaders to:

• Come out of their comfort zone,
• Calm down,
• Stay resilient,
• Be flexible, and
• Learn how to lead like a pro amid unplanned changes gracefully.

One of the insights that helped me evolve from a highly structured and rigid person to someone who now flows with change better than ever is Bruce Lee.

He said: “Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.”

What about you?

1. Do you keep the balance?
2. Which one is harder for you? The planning and structuring of your life part or dealing with disruption?
3. If you’re handling both well, what helped you do so?

Reach out to our team at [email protected] (Florida) or [email protected] (DMV area) if you would like us to help you and/or your team on how to lead effectively in both PLANNED and UNPLANNED (Crisis) changes.