12 Mar 5 What Not To Do If You Desire To Influence Your Boss

Everyone has a ‘boss’, including Presidents and CEOs. One’s success is highly dependent on one’s ability to influence others. The starting place to expand one’s influence should begin with one’s immediate boss (s).

Leaders who don’t get along with their superiors are ineffective. They can’t get things done and are liabilities to the people they lead…

Effective leaders are RESOURCEFUL and go beyond their backyard to attract resources, support, and form alliances that advance the mission of their teams, organizations, and countries.

Regardless of the attached risks, I coach and train emerging and middle leaders to be proactive and go the extra mile to influence their superiors. Some push back and complain that this doesn’t feel authentic. Others protest saying They don’t want to suck up to the boss. 

My answer is always simple: This isn’t about you. If you want to serve the greater good and the people who depend on you, you MUST MANAGE UP and bring resources, opportunities, support, approvals, and other needs of your team, organization, or community.

I always strive to draw some leadership lessons from major events, one of which happened a few weeks ago at the White House where the Presidents of the US and Ukraine had a televised debate. Using this episode, I came up with 5 DON’Ts if you desire to influence your superior or, for that matter, anyone who has more leverage.

A couple of quick disclaimers:

1. I’m not a political analyst. I’m a leadership expert who uses such major events to share leadership lessons.
2. I didn’t take sides. I refrained from making any political statements in favor of anyone.
3. Discussing the lessons on “What not to do if you’re the boss” is beyond the scope of this clip. I didn’t talk about what Trump and Vance, who had more leverage, should have done to make the engagement successful.
4. I refused to lecture you. For each lesson, I shared my personal and other relevant stories and examples, some of which you may find interesting. For instance, under the “Don’t violate the protocol” lesson, I shared how Winston Churchill, who visited the White House during World War II, dressed up. I also mentioned the dress code that Billionaires follow when they are invited to high places. Under “Don’t misalign with your boss”, I explained, for comparison purposes, how Starmer, Macron, and Putin fared when it comes to influencing Trump.

NEW DEVELOPMENT. Under the last lesson, “Don’t Lose What You Already Have”, I argued that venturing out and influencing your boss has attached risks if done wrongly. I also pointed out that since the influencing didn’t go well, Ukraine LOST the MILITARY AID and INTELLIGENCE SHARING, which they had before the episode in the White House. After the video was released, US and Ukrainian delegates met in Saudi Arabia and negotiated, and the suspension has been lifted. Though we don’t yet have details, Ukraine must have made many concessions, which they wouldn’t have made if the meeting in the White House hadn’t gone badly.

There is talk about Zelensky REVISITING the White House. I’ll watch whether it’ll be a rerun or an improvement. In the former case, things will worsen. In the latter case, I will watch which of the five Don’t Zelensky will honor to turn around the struggling bilateral relationship.

Check out the video to recognize the five lessons we should learn from the episode, customize, and apply those that resonate with you to take your influencing upward competency to the next level.