Destroying Victim Mentality

In my recent blog ‘What is & isn’t Greatness’, I demystified misunderstandings around the concept of greatness, and redefined true greatness. In that episode, I also pointed out that while the world has been rattled by the COVID19 pandemic and mourning the loss of lives and destruction of careers and businesses, we were greeted with the nonsense brutal murder of an unarmed already cuffed man on the ground in daylight by a brutal law enforcement official.

That incident was unfortunate for happening on the soil of America- a country that supposed to be a symbol of freedom and justice around the world. However, it brought together diverse people worldwide to demand justice, equality, institutional reforms, and policy changes. These changes, nonetheless, take years and sometimes even decades. That was why I suggested that we all, regardless of our differences, should play our parts to bring speedy institutional reforms and policy changes collectively while also not losing sight of working on ourselves to earn respect, for which we have absolute control.

By the way, that is why I decided to produce a series of episodes to empower underdogs to transform their lives into great during their lifetime, to become top dogs in the field of their choice. In this Episode entitled Destroying Victim Mentality, I used contemporary great ones such as Barack Obama, Oprah Winfrey, and Les Brown to show how these underdogs overcame and finally became top dogs in their respective industries regardless of the existence of victimizing people and systems. They succeeded and now they have a huge influence around the world because they had destroyed victim mentality.

I never met nor read a story of a great one who dwelt in victimhood, even those who were subjected to brutal victimization. Think about Nelson Mandela and how the apartheid regime subjected him to inhumane treatments for more than a quarter of a century. While in prison and after he was released, he demonstrated no sign of victimhood. Actually, he went the extra mile to show the world how he turned victimhood into victorhood.

Mandela forgave his tormentors. Not only that, but he also invited the prison guards who most probably tortured or beaten him up, or at least mistreated him at his inaugural ceremony. What is more? Madiba invited the state prosecutor- Percy Yutar, who was seeking the death penalty against him to lunch at the Presidential mansion. Nelson Mandela had no victim mentality and was free both from the physical confinement of prison walls and also the mental prison of revenge and bitterness. This shocked many including one of the victimizers, Percy Yutar. Before the lunch, he told journalists: “I wonder in what other country in the world would you have the head of the government inviting someone to lunch who prosecuted him thirty years ago.”

I would be lying to you if I tell you that I have never been infected by victimhood syndrome. Some years back, I spent hours and days to deal with some of the disempowering beliefs I had which were formed while I was a kid to make sure that I wasn’t hiding behind faulty beliefs as excuses. I was able to uproot many sabotaging beliefs that bred conscious and unconscious victimhood.

In Episode 15, I shared one of my recent victim mentalities and how I finally destroyed it when I increased my awareness, changed my thoughts, and took actions. In this episode, I also shared how victim mentality is formed, and the approaches one can use to destroy victim mentality. Watch the video clip and let me know if you may have any questions or topics I should cover in the upcoming episodes…

If you prefer to listen to the podcast version, here you go:

I’m conducting a series of webinars on the theme “Turning Conflicts into Opportunities in Times of Crisis”. Conflict happens everywhere. It is part of our history. It began when Cain killed Abel. Conflict happens at home, in the workplace, on the street, on the manufacturing floor, in the Board room, almost everywhere, except in the graveyards 6 feet deep down there. Thus, having conflict is not a bad thing at all, especially in times like this where we are experiencing all kinds of crises. Crisis breeds & aggravates conflicts.

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